I don’t speak of my life beyond the web page much, but I am feeling particularly self-revelatory at the moment. So I’m going to offer a few lines of personal disclosure in my State of the Blog for this year.
I confess 2010 has been a good year for me. When I am not writing or researching the arcane world of Theology and Philosophy, which is a full-time preoccupation, I manage a Technical Division for one of the top five educational companies in the US. My part in the company started as a very small concern—a line item on a much larger ledger sheet—and in the last two years the line item has grown … a lot.
On some level, that has put a damper on my plan to rule the world. I had to defer amassing armies and developing training camps for corporate P&L statements, acquisitions, and IT infrastructures.
I still wrote quite a bit over this last year, (close to 100K words) but the goal of launching the book publishing wing of my empire was deferred. I have mixed emotions about that. Almost three years ago, I said I had a book coming, and it is a good idea to deliver on stated objectives…
beyond some time constraints, the product was not really ready; hence, my conundrum.
I made it no secret that I have an in-depth evaluation of the Blight that has infected the Vineyard of the Church. To date, I have only addressed this in bits and pieces on www.spiritualtyranny.com but I have much to add about this phenomena. The path along the ideological arc is a well trod progression that has produced similar movements and parallel outcomes in ages past. To be sure, the very roots of this tyranny are as old as Man’s quest to understand the world in which he lives.
Because these roots are deep in world history and because America is revisiting the legacy of European thought, I was looking for the highest impact to illustrate what this is doing to American culture.
As a result I had some specific goals with the book.
- Empower readers with tools, intellectual tools, so they can gain confidence in their own life with God.
- Equip readers with the tools to the Arena of Ideas and the tides of Christian thought that are at the root of the practices that drive the problems.
- Talk candidly of the arguments that support oppressive practices.
- Give a blueprint of what it takes for people to emerge on the other side of such an experience.
In my own inimitable way, I set out to craft a book that contained those four objectives.
I succeeded … sort of.
I had some very gracious advance readers give me positive feedback and essential criticism, which of course made the manuscript better, but … my reaction to the early version, was ambivalence. I thought the book was maybe a little above average, at best, with a couple glimmers of more. It was a sufficient ambivalence that I shelved it for the better part of nine months to work on a separate book project. However, as time passed I found myself continuing to revisit content because the ideas were applicable even if the specific presentation had some weaknesses.
I knew it needed a rewrite but just didn’t want to do it. I had no better reason. I was singularly unmotivated for a half dozen reasons that don’t bear mentioning. The easy out was to just publish what I had and be done with it.
I could have published about a year ago; the means and the opportunity were at hand. And who really cares if the book is flawless in my mind? There is so much else to do, particularly when you have a corporate structure to answer to, right?
Anyway, I knew I could produce much better, and after some soul-searching, I decided that my readers deserve the content and my BEST EFFORT with that content. So, while on a dive cruise to Cozumel, Mexico, between playing with the sea turtles and eagle rays, I started my rewrite. The rewrite sparked research, which sparked a revision. The result: I am no longer ambivalent, and that is a good sign.